tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post6407822222501906437..comments2024-03-01T06:49:59.106-05:00Comments on Behind the Bit: Barn drama: Burning bridges, bad!Stacey Kimmel-Smithhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08498926535389535263noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-68897222603028117552016-07-16T13:19:31.224-04:002016-07-16T13:19:31.224-04:00Ive never boarded before but life changed and i no...Ive never boarded before but life changed and i now have to board. This is the worst experience ive ever had. I want to move desperately but i hear its the same wherever you go. I HATE my barn manager. He goes out of his way to pick on me till i snap back. Then he calls me names and repeats the names and how much he hates me to all the other boarders. The basics...he wants my horse. He thinks sheAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-36232328672878329652010-12-09T04:31:56.157-05:002010-12-09T04:31:56.157-05:00The barn drama that I experience comes from 15-25 ...The barn drama that I experience comes from 15-25 year old girls who are no longer being watched by their parents. They sit at the barn in their talk groups and say hurtful things about people who are not there. There is always one person who takes what they have heard to the missing person and embellishes/twists and changes the information to make it worse. Can't seem to catch this personAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-92052855943239683492009-09-15T12:59:19.408-04:002009-09-15T12:59:19.408-04:00HI! I also am experiencing the barn drama thing. ...HI! I also am experiencing the barn drama thing. This is my third barn! I recently got back into horses about three years ago and it has always been my dream since I was a little girl. I finally did it and I learn day by day new things and that I love. What I don't love is all of the mean and weird people I have had to deal with in the past three years and now. I really try to be a quiet Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-23371809929841256932009-08-14T06:32:20.123-04:002009-08-14T06:32:20.123-04:00Arrgh, anonymous. I think barns can be tough place...Arrgh, anonymous. I think barns can be tough places to be, my only advice is to analyze what you might be doing to inadverdently contribute to the situation. Sometimes being too nice can encourage people to take advantage of you, make sure you stick up for yourself. You say you aren't a gossip (one of my downfalls), might there be other things? I know that once at a barn I overheard someoneStacey Kimmel-Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08498926535389535263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-41396661719901348462009-08-14T00:56:22.520-04:002009-08-14T00:56:22.520-04:00Horse owners are definitely NOT stable people! I&...Horse owners are definitely NOT stable people! I've had nothing but trouble at every barn. I don't like gossip and won't participate in it. But it seems that is all anyone does. I always try to help in any way and will volunteer for things. Then I usually get taken advantage of and taken for granted. It seems that I am always the one that ends up being the "bad guy", Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-73287045198600004262009-04-08T16:44:00.000-04:002009-04-08T16:44:00.000-04:00Wow. I need to write something like this for the ...Wow. I need to write something like this for the dog world. And maybe the fanfic-writing world, too. In fact, the world in general could use a short dose of this lesson.<BR/><BR/>Congratulations on writing a universal truth with good tips for a side dish!trackerhttp://www.sniffydog.today.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-70059653046872053732009-04-06T19:01:00.000-04:002009-04-06T19:01:00.000-04:00Kind of lucked out in all my moves except one. And...Kind of lucked out in all my moves except one. And in that case, someone else moved too and took the heat. <BR/><BR/>I am so glad I have my Boys at home, now. Solves the problem. When I want to complain to the barn owner, I am talking to myself. *G*Jeanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10029423500476995817noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-82671504172660649402009-04-06T09:12:00.000-04:002009-04-06T09:12:00.000-04:00Wow. I'm rather shocked to hear this sort of vindi...Wow. I'm rather shocked to hear this sort of vindictiveness goes on. I must either be very unobservant or very lucky. Horses are a privilege and a relaxing pastime. It is too bad anyone would want to focus energy on making it unpleasant for others. Even more appalling that someone might take it out on an innocent horse, by being lax with care or worse!<BR/><BR/>I've never changed barns or A Bay Horsehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16519878838113259362noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-32860305850713582242009-04-06T06:53:00.000-04:002009-04-06T06:53:00.000-04:00Well, I have to admit I'm a bit of a gossip, but m...Well, I have to admit I'm a bit of a gossip, but more of the "who has a new horse" variety than truly malicious stuff. I don't wish anybody ill.<BR/><BR/>I have also left two boarding barns early, paying for my month and clearing out. The second time, the barn workers (kind a shady crowd with substance abuse issues) stopped taking the poop out of Harvey's stall -- just piled it in a corner. I Stacey Kimmel-Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08498926535389535263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-11004896907930660982009-04-06T05:34:00.000-04:002009-04-06T05:34:00.000-04:00I always make an effort to be respectful and I kno...I always make an effort to be respectful and I know that pays off. My reputation preceedes me these days, which cracks me up! Even when people are doing things that are not so great you just have to try and see why they are acting the way they are. The last horse I leased before my fat Appy was a great horse, but his owner and I did not agree about care at all. It drove me crazy because I think Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-36942409812226989402009-04-06T03:08:00.000-04:002009-04-06T03:08:00.000-04:00This was a very nice post, and a thing people need...This was a very nice post, and a thing people need to think about.<BR/><BR/>There is another thing to this that could have been included in this post: No matter how irritated you are, or how much the situation sucks, Do Not Vent On The Internet. The people you are mad about will see it/hear about it eventually, and then the situation can get really bad in a second.<BR/><BR/>I recently left my Cargo & Lenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02602233803433147034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-2368984415810414862009-04-06T02:25:00.000-04:002009-04-06T02:25:00.000-04:00I've had the complete nightmare of a departure whe...I've had the complete nightmare of a departure where the trainers made it miserable for me to move on, And I've had the refreshingly amicable departure that eventually brought me back "home". I don't know why trainers make it so stressful, if they are civil about it the client may return (like me). It is the best when your old trainer, that made it miserable to move on, is at the rail when you Five O'Clock Somewherehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00764856841984160593noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-77152962076429909862009-04-06T01:09:00.000-04:002009-04-06T01:09:00.000-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Alesandranoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-70632622393701038632009-04-05T22:31:00.000-04:002009-04-05T22:31:00.000-04:00Yes, no matter what one may think of a trainer, fa...Yes, no matter what one may think of a trainer, farrier, or barn owner, it's probably best not to talk ill of them. Keep the reasons for leaving out of conversations whenever possible. After all, it's a small horse world and word definitely gets around. Even if that trainer, farrier, or barn owner doesn't suit my needs, the next person may be quite happy with their methods.Fantastyk Voyagerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15065772565014490544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-68344855809540040902009-04-05T21:48:00.000-04:002009-04-05T21:48:00.000-04:00At a boarding stable, you should give your thirty ...At a boarding stable, you should give your thirty days notice in <I>writing</I>, just like breaking any other contract. I agree that you should tell your soon-to-be-former barn owner in person, but occasionally you'll get the dingbat who you gave notice and they, uh, claimed you didn't. >.< Getting something in writing goes a long way towards clearing that up.<BR/><BR/>To be Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15203611762503036829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-34296271313708136132009-04-05T21:43:00.000-04:002009-04-05T21:43:00.000-04:00well put. regardless of karma, you don't want to b...well put. regardless of karma, you don't want to be the barn gossip, anyway. keep your reputation up by speaking politely of others.mackenziehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11033139808477724525noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-10791602815851646282009-04-05T21:41:00.000-04:002009-04-05T21:41:00.000-04:00Good post.We have made it a point to never burn br...Good post.<BR/><BR/>We have made it a point to never burn bridges when switching boarding barns or farriers. A polite (and vague if necessary) explanation tends to suffice.<BR/><BR/>It's nice to know that, in an emergency, previous contacts are unlikely to turn us away because of a nasty end to a business relationship.manymisadventureshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00269126419483167938noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-4715803781025914102009-04-05T21:22:00.000-04:002009-04-05T21:22:00.000-04:00Excellent post! How many of us have known someone ...Excellent post! How many of us have known someone who has moved from barn to barn and caused discord in their wake, yet never sees it as of their own doing? <BR/><BR/>I had to part ways with a farrier last year and left a very civil message stating I needed to use another provider since it was "just not working out". The guy just would never get there to shoe my horse and I once waited 12 weeks SolitaireMarehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05573053727692879169noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6317822193674196694.post-41248252156766011292009-04-05T21:11:00.000-04:002009-04-05T21:11:00.000-04:00I've always made it a rule to not bad mouth former...I've always made it a rule to not bad mouth former barn managers/trainers/farriers - you're right about the karma thing. If it's something important (such as a trainer or barn manager who is abusive to people and/or horses), I usually find some way to warn people off without actually saying anything directly negative. A little like former employers! The horse world is often a small place - likeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com